In absolute effortless quietness within, while the sounds on the outside did nothing to interrupt, a message dropped by. It wasn’t something I’ve read about nor did it feel familiar to the memory. An unbiased, untouched sort of fact that left me with no option but to believe. Many a time such information comes in leaving neither doubt nor an urge to explore further online. I don’t call them thoughts because there seems to be a clear yet unexplainable understanding that they are each different in nature.
‘The body is a sensing instrument. All that longs to be acknowledged comes to and through it. A place for sensations to come alive and feel their existence for they have no other way. What the body does for them cannot be done for itself and vice versa. The form and formless know of themselves when into a human they blend. The answer to what ‘I am’ beyond these two still remains to be experienced in its truth, yet the faith that I am being pulled into its direction gives freedom from worry. The calling is strong, hinting to look at what has been right here and not perceived. As days go by, the ever-accessible silence to which I connect shows bit by bit of what was never hidden yet revealed because now I am ready.
I search for the timeless state where the infinite is believed to reside and this unknown voice asks – How could that which is free of time be understood by that which has only known of time. The mind, which swings in the madness of past and future, memory and imagination, assures to be the one who can grasp timelessness. A trickery indeed. What could words do with their limitation to capture the unlimited? How could the knowledge that you seek of the unknown be found in the field known? Free your addiction from this quest of a realization through others no matter how great they appear to be. In their words is only a description that can sound fascinating yet does nothing to get a step closer. You came in contact to only go so far until convinced of trusting the wisdom being poured from a source not outside of you. This body that you have now realized to be a device that receives, is capable to transmit the knowledge that you so passionately seek.’
All of a sudden, I could see the intention behind reading books, quotes, articles etc was to feed my identity of a spiritual inquirer. This may happen to a lot of people who are tricked to believe there is a path or method or a person that will ultimately bring release or peace. For me, it wasn’t getting anywhere except for jumping authors, philosophers, mystical topics, and sharing them assuming others are ignorant. It all stopped when the mind had overused its capacity and saw there was nothing being achieved. It gave up on itself. That was a WOW moment! In phases, it had been letting go of being the controlling authority when something else had begun to speak up in its place. As if there were two extreme views operating where this new one had a more complete way of observing and literally exposing to the mind / identity / ego its constraints and inadequacies. How it would chop and reorganize information to sustain certain beliefs that were dear to ‘me’. Gradually, everything that has revolved around fixing the image of ‘Saachi’ as a definitive personality is being disintegrated and turning out to be a beautiful process.
Only a consistent and honest reflection of the self could make this happen. I’m sure there’s more in the waiting to show up as this continues.